Monday, February 18, 2008

BLOG 8

Aimee Vasquez
18 February 2008
Journalism 203
Professor B. Teufel



             The conflict of February 2003 thrust Darfur into international consciousness, and, for some, conscience; but Sudan's intricate and volatile war, like a knot with many threads, traces back much further (Salih). The war is actually a cumulation of events dating from Sudan's independence from Turco-Egyptian rule in 1956, set against centuries of racial tension (Salih). Further, the war is more nuanced than merely an ethnic clash between African rebel movements and the largely Arabic Sudanese government (Tar). Widening racial polarity and constant war over poorly-distributed, poorly-developed resources are recurring themes in Darfur's turbulent history (Salih). Yet prior to 2003, these conflicts went largely unnoticed (Tar). Deemed a genocide by Congress, and, "the world's worst humanitarian crisis," by the United Nations (Willemse), these terms really only scratch the surface of the conflict in Darfur (Tar; Salih). While the race-factor is a catalyst that turned a recurring conflict over resources into an internationally-famous "genocide", the war itself is rooted in a tangle of religious diversity, shortage of goods, poorly-distributed resources, ill-handled government, ethnic conflict, and Sudanese politic (Tar; Salih).
              The diversity of Sudan makes it an unusually unstable region of Africa. It is not only Africa's "largest nation-state," but it is also one of its most diverse (Tar). The population of 28 million is comprised of over 20 linguistic groups, as well as a variety of religions including Islam and Christianity (Tar). Since Sudan's independence from Turco-Egyptian rule, one of the key themes of its troubled history has been domestic conflict (Salih). This domestic conflict escalated to the internationally-renowned clash beginning in 2003 (Tar). The immediate reasons for this clash were the competition of Darfur's two main ethnic groups—Arabic and African—in a struggle over natural resources (Tar). The Sudanese government furthered this conflict by arming the largely Arabic militia, turning a competition over resources in to a venue for long-standing racial hatred (Tar). Two rebel movements, The Sudanese Liberation Army/Movement (SLA/M) and the Justice and Equality Movement (JEM) joined forces to demand the development of the neglected regions of Darfur, as well as equal representation in government (Tar). The rebellion escalated as the Sudanese government met their request not with diplomacy, but with war (Tar). This war began to resemble genocide, for the Sudanese government armed and then lost control of a militia force whose brutal reputation soon earned them the title of the Janjaweed, or "Devil Horseman" (Willemse). This militia is largely comprised of nomadic Arabs, while the rebellion forces are mostly made up of stationary African farmers (Salih). This racial polarization of forces turned a conflict over resources into a war waged largely over race, a venue for centuries of hatred, and which has since earned the term of genocide (Tar).
              While tribal conflict in Sudan began to brew centuries ago, the current racial polarization is most relevantly traced back to 1956, when Sudan gained independence from Turco-Egyptian rule (Salih). A side-effect of Sudan's independence was the intensification of Darfur's politically-based ethnic divisions, as well as a shortage of provisions due to concurrent urbanization and population growth (Salih). Sudan's liberation from Turco-Egyptian rule thus brought not stability, but increased conflict to the already volatile region (Salih). The military coups of 1958, 1969, and 1989 further destabilized the region, while racial divides were increasingly drawn along political lines (Salih). The coup of 1989 was largely propagated by the National Islamic Front, or NIF, and led to the current Sudanese government (Willemse; Salih). Darfur's incessant civil war during this period led to the Sudanese government's creation of the Popular Defense Force, or PDF (Salih). The PDF is an extreme Islamic group, which by 1996 outnumbered the regular army (Salih). It was through this increasingly popular use of tribal militias that the current Janjaweed came into being (Willemse; Salih). Janjaweed is a term used to describe the NIF's militias which, as aforesaid, are largely comprised of nomadic Arabic groups (Salih). The creation of the militias led to the increased polarization of ethnic groups, an already hair-trigger relationship due to steadily increasing conflict over Darfur's resources (Salih).
                Shortage of resources became yet another source of racial polarization between the nomadic Arab groups and the mostly African farmers (Tar). However, the line from resource shortage to ethnic cleansing bears some explanation. Several prolonged droughts led to an increasingly fierce competition for the region's natural resources (Tar). Darfur's African tribal groups, such as the Fur, the Masalit, and the Zaghawa, are comprised mostly of stationary farmers (Tar). The majority of the Arabic peoples of northern Darfur are shepherds, rearing camels and cattle (Tar). During times of drought and subsequent famine, the Arabic pastoralists ranged further afield, seeking food and water for their livestock (Salih). Although there were many droughts throughout the 1970s and 1980s, a particularly severe drought-induced famine ravaged Darfur between 1984 and 1985, and led to large-scale losses of Arabic livestock (Tar). The Arab pastoralists turned increasingly to grazing their dwindling flocks upon the farmlands of the African settlers (Tar). The African farmers fought back, for grazing animals wreak havoc upon farmland (Tar). As the famine worsened, nomadic Arabic pastoralists' turned increasingly to raiding African farmers as well (Tar). This violent competition between the Arab shepherd groups and African farming communities set up an extremely volatile situation. It only needed the introduction of firearms to edge it on the bloody road to genocide (Tar).
               While this competition and the resulting conflict were not unusual for Darfur, the late 1980s conflict would prove unique due to the almost simultaneous introduction of firearms to both the Arabic and the African factions (Tar). By January 1988, "there were at least 50,000 automatic weapons in Darfur—one for every sixteen adult men." (Tar). The introduction of firearms proved to be a match upon dry tender; the "deadly combination," of firearms and a state rife with instability and racial hatred proved to be the first active steps toward the current-day genocide (Tar).
                Successive Sudanese political parties furthered Darfur's already volatile state by promising firearms to "loyal," groups (Tar). However, the Sudanese government is largely comprised of the Arabic elite, while the African farmers increasingly and correspondingly aligned themselves with the rebellion (Willemse). The African tribes of the Fur, the Masalit, and the Zaghawa were among the first to align themselves with the rebellion, but as it was increasingly drawn-out in racial lines, smaller African tribes followed suit (Willemse). Perhaps the match to the tender was the discovery of petroleum in 1999 (Tar). While the increase in fortune could have been used to improve the country of Darfur, the Sudanese government instead poured the extra funds in to the military (Tar). This "military," however was comprised in large-part by a the vindictive Arabic Janjaweed (Tar). The conflict over scarce resources catapulted into a racial vendetta and climaxed with the revolt of the African Justice and Equality Movement and the Sudanese Liberation Army/Movement in 2002-2003 (Tar). The Sudanese government refused, and the genocide began (Tar).




Salih, M.A. Mohamed. (2005). Understanding the Conflict in Darfur. Occasional Papers from                the Centre of African Studies, University of Copenhagen. Retrieved February 16, 2008,                from http://www.teol.ku.dk/cas/nyhomepage/mapper/Occasional%20Papers/
           Muhamed_Salih%20samlet%20paper.pdf

Tar, Usman. (2006). Old Conflict, New Complex Emergency: An Analysis of Darfur Crisis,                       Western Sudan [Electronic version]. Nordic Journal of African Studies 15(3), 406-427.                 Retrieved February 16, 2008, from http://www.njas.helsinki.fi/

Willemse, Karen. (2005). Darfur in War: The Politicization of Ethnic Identities [Electronic                     version]. ISIM Review, 15. Retrieved February 16, 2008, from http://www.isim.nl/
            files/Review_15/Review_15-14.pdf>










Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Creative LEDES Assignment

LEDES:
1. Actual article/Profile


2. Contrast
A young lady leaves a set of silk boxers at his hotel lobby. Another spends $6,000 for a day at his house. Movie star? No. Dirt bike racer.


3. Teaser
His mother hired armed guards to escort him off the plane.This should have been a fairly simple task, considering his right leg was held together with duct-tape. He got away.


4. Mystery
The body plummeting toward the earth was that of a teenage boy without a parachute. They took a picture of him as he fell. He plans to hang it in his living room.


5. Quote
They were not the words that Debbie Pastrana wanted to hear. "Mom, if I die, I die doing what I love."


6. List
He's suffered more than 25 concussions. He's broken more than 60 bones. He's had over 23 surgeries. But those are minor details to Travis Pastrana, compared to the roster of his accomplishments.


7. Question
Why do some people possess the pathological desire to - almost - kill themselves for the sake of fun? Travis Pastrana takes this drive a step further, and that extra step has forever immortalized him. His stunts surpass even the boldest base-jumper. Pastrana, at just past 20, has already flipped a bike off the Grand Canyon, jumped out of a plane without a parachute, and pulled a double back-flip on a dirt bike.

8. Cliche
They say that opportunity doesn't knock more than once. For Travis Pastrana, that might be a good thing.

FEATURE OUTLINE

Headline: SLO County Coalition Works to Overcome Childhood Obesity
Focus: An up-and-coming San Luis Obispo County coalition known as HEAL SLO (Healthy Eating Active Living San Luis Obispo,) seeks to stem the tide of childhood obesity.
Theme: Make a difference! A large and worthwhile movement is underway. Hop on board.
Idea for Lede:
Slow and steady wins the race; and SLO is steadily winning the race - against childhood obesity, that is. While childhood obesity, and its resulting health concerns, is of national importance, dealing with it might be done most effectively at the community-level. At least, that's what leaders of the Childhood Obesity Prevention Task Force believe.

Outline. (Probably will need to tweak it as I write)
I. The problem: Childhood Obesity (nationwide, but focus is SLO county) Epidemic
  A.  What percentage of our children are obese/overweight?
  i.  Statistics of childhood obesity
ii. What is classified as "obese" vs. "overweight"
iii. What percentage of children are obese/overweight
  iv. 20-25 years ago/now
v. compared to European stats
B. Why should we care?
i. Health problems. Obesity causes increased risk of:
a.  Diabetes. Cardiovascular disease. etc. higher death rate/reduced life expectancy
C. Why obesity is a "growing" problem
i. Lack of physical activity/overconsumption of calories due to:
ii. Lack of education, in this case parents/school programs targeted, to encourage/teach better food choices among children
iii.  Widespread availability of fast/processed food, especially in school settings
iv.  Increase in sedentary activities
a.  Children used to play outside with friends/now chat online
b. Competitive sport emphasized over "play." Children who lack competency in particular sports end up hating it and dropping it when old enough (Interview: Prof. Milner of Westmont College?)
c. TV/internet/video games.
II. Combating the problem: (this section will be expanded upon after the interviews)
A. Community-wide Task Force under acronym: "HEAL SLO"
i. Stands for Healthy Eating Active Living San Luis Obispo
B. Who it involves?
i. Childhood Obesity Prevention Task Force:
a. Widespread Coalition of Schools/Health Centers/Community Centers/parents/children
b. Santa Barbara, Ventura, and other counties implementing or already have similar programs
i.  List goals
a. Goals of organization.
C. What are their methods?
  i. Socio-Ecological model
ii. Emphasizes holistic wellness: healthy eating, active living. Balanced, healthy, and long-term lifestyle choices. III. How does this involve you? Don't have to be a parent.
III. How to get involved
A. Personal level:
i. Set good example
a. If you're overweight/practice unhealthy eating habits, how can you expect your child/child's life to be any different? Children emulate the adults in their life
ii. Learn about healthy eating choices
a. Through sites such as the Gold Coast Regional Nutrition Network, American Health Association, Mayo Clinic
b. Community classes
c. Newsletters/books/reading materials (list top few)
iii. If parent, talk to children about healthy eating choices and only buy healthy food
iv. Encourage active lifestyle:
a. By taking walks with them rather than watching TV or other more sedentary activities
b. Take to national/regional parks to explore nature
c. Help them understand that even if they're not good at, for instance, ball sports, they might love something like hiking or rock climbing. Alternative activities
B. At a community level
i. Encourage local schools to incorporate healthier eating options into lunches/snack machines
ii. List community programs that parents/adults can get involved in for a more action-oriented approach
iii. Donate to: (list links)


Sources:
Rachael Willey
SLO Public Health Department
Contact for Obesity Prevention Task Force
Tel: (805) 215-9524
email: rmwilley@gmail.com

Gold Coast Regional Nutrition Network
Ramona Sloan, MPH, GCRNN Director
Tel: 805.677.5279
Contact: Amy Gilman
email: acgillman@yahoo.com

Phyllis Bramson-Paul, MPPA
Director, Nutrition Services Division (NSD), California Department of Education
Tel: (916) 323-7311
Email: pbramson@cde.ca.gov

Pat Crawford, DrPH, RD
Adjunct Professor, Nutrition Specialist, and Co-Director of the UC Berkeley Center for Weight and Health
Tel: (510) 642-5572
Email: crawford@socrates.berkeley.edu

Scott Gee, MD
Medical Director of Prevention and Health Information at Kaiser Permanente – Northern California
Telephone: (510) 987-4358
Email: scott.gee@kp.org

Nancy Gelbard, MPH, RD
Chief of California Obesity Prevention Initiative at the Department of Health Services (COPI)
Tel: (916) 552-9949 or (530) 220-7859
Email: ngelbard@dhs.ca.gov

Monday, February 11, 2008

FRESH AIR ASSIGNMENT

1.
a. The subject of, "Sean Michael Flynn, 'From Ground Zero to Baghdad' " was the Fighting 69th: the New York National Guard who started out as a sloppy, rough-shod force and ended up fighting in Baghdad.
b. My favorite interviewing technique in this interview was the depth of knowledge the interviewer had about the subject. This enabled her to ask questions that were pertinent and concise. My favorite question however was merely, "Like?" This was the most open-ended question, and allowed the commander to go off on a slight side-note about roadside bombs that I found more interesting than many of the more thought-out answers. On the flip side, I didn't like how the focus limited the breadth of the interviewees' answers. Everything seemed rather cut-and-dried. If anything, I learned to have a thorough knowledge of the subject, but to let the interviewee volunteer more information.

"Sean Michael Flynn, 'From Ground Zero to Baghdad' "
Fresh Air from WHYY, January 24, 2008
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=18373499


2.
a. The subject of, "Held Captive: Hostages Share Their Experience," was the personal experiences of two guests who had at some time or other been held hostage, as well as call-in interviews with other people of similar experience.
b. I liked how open-ended the interviewer's questions were. This led to a more interesting conversation than the previous piece. Some of my favorite questions were, "Tell us briefly what happened to you." "What was that like?" and "Were you afraid for your life?" All of these questions opened up the door for elaboration and personal testimony. I didn't like how the call-in aspect let people who perhaps didn't have as relevant of experience comment. Such as the woman who called in and talked about being held for 4 hours by a sheriff's deputy. I learned that if you ask open-ended questions, you seem to get more interesting answers, but at the same time it is good to have a grasp on the subject and, perhaps more importantly, to have a never-ending stream of pertinent questions on the back-burner to keep the interview flowing, no matter what turn it might take.

"Held Captive: Hostages Share Their Experience"
Talk of the Nation, January 21, 2008
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=18286860


3. 
a. The subject of "Heavyweight George Foreman" was divided between boxing, his grill, finances, and business. But everything seemed to come back to business, for the show's focus was a financial one.
b. My favorite question was, "What type of boy was George Foreman?" My favorite technique was the interviewer's ability for controlling the conversation and bringing a rambling George Foreman back to the central issue - which was finances and business investments. It seems like a handy skill to have when interviewing people who like to ramble or have trouble focusing. On the flip side, I didn't like how the interviewers handled this skill, for it seemed like they overused it in this particular interview. This made the interview feel very restrained and dry, and made the hosts seem a bit condescending. I also didn't like how the hosts interrupted Foreman fairly often. It seemed to stifle the more interesting facts and stories just as Foreman was getting in to them. I did however learn how important it is to be able to bring your interviewee's talk back in to focus, but to not be so focused that it kills their true voice/opinions. It seems like a fine line to walk.

"Heavyweight George Foreman"
The Motley Fool, March 31, 2006
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=5317123

CLEARLY-LABELED Assignment 9: Interview















    
    
 
       He came out from the door at the back of the decorative, rectangular shop and hunched over the glass counter, both lower lip and graying eyebrows protruding slightly. He didn't have time to interview. The meeting had run late; they were busy. He paused a grudging second: "Well....what do you want to know?"

      Rich Dziedzic is the owner of 5 Cities Florist, a small, full-service flower shop on Grand Avenue in Arroyo Grande. While his wife has been a florist for 40 years, Dziedzic is a relative newcomer to the business. A native of Chicago, Dziedzic retired from commercial printing several years ago, but he wasn't ready to quit just yet. The Dziedzics' decided to purchase a small flower shop in the temperate climate of the Central California coast. "We'd been thinking about it for years," he said. "So when the opportunity came about, we bought it." They've now owned the shop on East Grand for 6 years, and are kept busy providing arrangements for weddings, funerals, wire-outs, wire-ins, and banquets. Dziedzic is first-generation Polish; his wife is Polish-Norwedgian. A brief smile flickered across his face as he glanced back through the door, "My wife is very beautiful," he added in a temporarily raised voice.

      Dziedzic believes that this Polish upbringing influences the way that he does business. His, "roots go a little bit deeper" than many of the families he knows. For instance, his parents celebrated every holiday - even the smaller ones. "People are generally not as festive out here," he said. "The little holidays seem to fall through the cracks." For instance, while Valentine's Day sees plentiful business, the Dziedzics were in for a surprise their first California Easter. They were, as Dziedzic said, "all ready for Easter - we ordered lots of lilies." But Easter came and went, and no one bought them. Regardless of differences in background, Dziedzic says that the relationships he gets to develop with his customers are the best part of being a small-town florist. The Dziedzics' cosy, ornamental shop sees lots of regulars, of all ages and backgrounds. He likes the temperate California climate too. It's ideal for growing his favorite flower - the orchid.

      He straightened up a bit, eyebrows protruding again. "Is that all you wanted?" The interview was over.





Contact Info:
Five Cities Florist
917 Grand Ave.
Arroyo Grande, CA 93420
Phone:
(805) 489-5502 Store

Monday, February 4, 2008

CLEARLY-LABELED ASSIGNMENT 7

Originally Hard Ledes:

1. CHICAGO -- Baby shampoos, lotions and powders may expose infants to chemicals that have been linked with possible reproductive problems, a small study suggests. (hard)
1a. Parents beware: clean children may seem to be synonymous with good health, but a recent study finds that this might not always be the case. (soft)

Tanner, Lindsay. "Chemicals in Baby Products Raise Concern." Washington Post Online. 4 Feb 2008. http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp- dyn/content/article/2008/02/04/AR2008020400073.html

2. TINLEY PARK, Ill. -- As police continued their search Sunday for a gunman who killed five women at a suburban Chicago strip mall a day earlier, passers-by erected a memorial of five white crosses and flowers to the victims. (hard)
2a. You usually don't think to bring a bullet-proof vest to shop for clothes. Five white crosses outside a suburban Chicago strip mall says that might not be a bad idea. (soft)

Tarm, Michael. "Gunman Sought in Deadly Store Shooting." Washington Post Online. 3 Feb 2008. http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp- dyn/content/article/2008/02/03/AR2008020300529_pf.html

3. After weeks of stalled talks, negotiators in the entertainment writers' strike have suddenly made "substantial progress" in their discussions, people with knowledge of the talks said yesterday, raising hopes in Hollywood that a settlement could come as early as this week.
3a. Reruns beware: Striking writers of our tremulous entertainment industry might finally have learned to, "talk it out."

Farhi, Paul and Lisa de Moraes. "Major Progress in Writers' Strike Talks
Deal." Washington Post Online. 3 Feb 2008. http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp- dyn/content/article/2008/02/02/AR2008020202390_pf.html


Originally Soft Ledes/Features

1. Poinsettias carpet the carefully tended gardens of Oaxaca's arch-ringed main plaza, where smoking wreckage and barricades stood just over a year ago. Local bands and marimbas have replaced the sound of explosions, and the smell of gasoline bombs and tear gas have given way to the scent of coffee and mole sauce, two of Oaxaca's specialties. (soft)
1a. Oaxaca's tourist culture makes a comeback after a year of leftist anti-government striking and violence, but its accustomed tourist crowds are slow to follow. (hard)

Stevenson, Mark. "Tourists Return To Oaxaca, Mexico." New York Daily News Online. 29 Jan 2008.http://breakingnews.nydailynews.com/dynamic/stories/T/TRAVEL_TRIP_MEXI
CO_OAXACA_REBIRTH_TRVOL?SITE=NYNYD&SECTION=HEALTH&TEMPLATE
=DEFAULT

2. Tucked into a valley 1,600 feet above sea level and framed by the purple-hued foothills of the Andes Mountains, the quaint northern Argentine town of Cafayate is home to some of the highest-altitude vineyards in the world. (soft)
2a. High-altitude Argentinean vineyards ideal setting for guests to drink, eat, and relax at Michel Torino's luxurious Wine Spa, located just outside of Cafayate. (hard)

Ramani, Sandra. "Wine Flourishes in Argentina." New York Daily News Online. 27 Jan 2008. http://www.nydailynews.com/lifestyle/travel/2008/01/27/2008-01- 27_wine_flourishes_in_argentina-1.html

3. Edgar Freemantle made millions in the construction business and then was crushed nearly to death by one of his own cranes. But hey, that's Stephen King's world. (soft)
3a. Stephen King's new novel, Duma Key, bears a striking resemblance to the Rime of the Ancient Mariner, but takes readers much longer to get through. (hard)

Hinckley, David. " 'Duma Key,' Stephen King's Latest, Is a Slow Read Indeed." New York Daily News Online. 2 Feb 2008. http://www.nydailynews.com/entertainment/arts/2008/02/03/2008-02- 03_duma_key_stephen_kings_latest_is_a_slow_.html




Sunday, February 3, 2008

Surfing. Reflections in the Sea.

A long time ago, I went out on a run.


It was a cold, foggy morning. Like running in a moving gray sphere that is a shadow of the world. I crossed the 1 and cut through a trailer home park and found the beach. The beach on a foggy morning is a very silent place. Even the sounds seem to contribute to the greater overall Silence. Then I saw them: a horde of black seals. Human seals. Hooded up against the cold; floating on a gray sea that itself floated in a sea of gray. Floating out there to appreciate the silence, the power, the surge of a sea at dawn when there is no sun.

I ran along the beach. My run seemed rather lame. I was pretty darn proud of my running abilities - this long before the specter of knee injury - but I was running on solid ground; they seemed to walk on liquid. Walk? Some danced--skidded, slid, tripped, down the front of the waves--only to kick out, sink, and disappear into the gray. The gray that is the sea at dawn.

And I think that's what I like about surfing. It's not only the aspect of speed, adventure, activity. Don't get me wrong: I like the adventure too. The intensity of a wipeout. The feeling of taking flight when you slide down the front of a curling green wall. The sense that your horizon is alive, seething, picking itself up, doubling over on top of itself. I find I even like getting hurt - if it means I've done something out of the ordinary.


But that surface of adrenalin is not the only reason I like surfing. I can get that with a score of other sports. With surfing, it's the ability to emerge myself in something so much greater than myself. The ability to play, like a mouse with a wolf, and escape unharmed or with only a few bruises that are something like medals. The ability to ride raw power on a piece of foam and fiberglass. There's nothing quite like the feeling when it takes, and the board becomes spring-loaded on the wave, and you're crouched - poised, in control.....okay so totally and completely out of control. You can't control the ocean, silly. Even when it feels like it.


That run was a long time ago. Now I'm the person out on the waves. Only I don't wear a hood. And I don't surf in the morning. I used to. I tried to like it....but seriously, the waves die down, the sunrise fades to day, the day starts up and everything else is a let-down. Race to class, work, homework. Even hanging out is a let-down after surfing. That might be the hypothermic effect though....Perhaps things will be better now that I have a wetsuit without holes.


But sunset-surfing? Things just get better. Like a life well-lived. You look forward to it all day. You run across the beach just as the waves are starting to pick up. Chill sand; freezing cold water that laps up your legs, waist, chest. Ouch. Gasp. Ice-water. Literally breath-snatching cold. Dunk your head. Crap. Cold. Gasp. Breathe...ahhh. That's better. Forget about the cold and paddle out gleefully. Pungent taste of salt and brine; smell like old sushi soaked in the salty ocean breeze. Shrivel your lips; scour your face; dread your hair. Salt and sun. The surf picks up, better and better, until the best waves and the most incredible part of the day coincide: sunset on an ocean. The world might be reversed for all you know, and you floating in the sunset and looking up at a sea. And then the moon comes out and you're in the middle of day and night--the juncture of the last glow of coral sun and a trembling moonpath spider-webbed across the water.


I don't know about you, but I can never seem to get close enough to the sunset. It's over-awing, breathtaking--but painfully distant. Makes me ache with an odd sort of pain that seems to burrow out my soul and make it bigger; reveals depths that presumably will make me a better person. It's the same part that you become aware of the more passionately you pray, or love, or try not to love....or begin to miss someone as you watch them die. Perhaps I can never get close enough to the sunset, because it IS perfection--and while our souls are eternal, our minds are still finite--and so the sunset will never fit, and that squeeze is painful. Just like when we pray, or love, or miss someone, we're not dealing with the finite anymore. It's something bigger, grander, eternal--and it's not human, and it doesn't fit in our finite humanity. So it's painful, like trying to fit a foot in a shoe that is too small.



I recently came face to face with death. It was horrific, drawn-out, painful. I sat there at my loved one's bedside, holding her hand and promising that it was not an end....not an end but a change. I told her that I would be there with her until that change, and that I would join her before too long. We all would. There was no reason to be scared. I told myself that when she was gone I'd go out and sit on my surfboard, and stare at the sunset. Remind myself of the eternity that I believe in indubitably enough to promise it to a sane but dying person--but that I can't experience tangibly but for my sunset surf. Burrowing out the depths of my soul. Painful beauty; beautiful pain, for it presumably makes me a better person. The drawing back of the veil - as if the sunset were drawing back its curtain and showing what it is beyond that makes us ache and wish to be closer.


So surfing is not only sport, as I intuited that long-ago day I first saw the surfers dancing in the gray. There is something much grander, bigger, further-reaching about floating in the upside-down sky. Like being face-to-face with eternity. The beauty beyond the ache and the pain. Like the rainbow promises the earth won't again be flooded, the reflection of the sunset in the flood promises the earth is not our bound of reality.

So while surfing improves reality; what I'm surfing in proves what I know to come after. Past the struggling break. Immersed in the ocean; submerged in the sunset. The closest thing to eternity I know of. And I get to play in it. And the shadow of the fog-bound earth slips away. Stillness. Vastness. Silence. Indescribable beauty and a peace that passes all understanding.


It's the closest thing I know to getting the shoe on.